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Thursday, 02 March 2006 |
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DEPTARMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY ALERT We've just been notified by Security that there have been 6 suspected terrorists working out of your office. Five of the six have been apprehended. Bin Sleepin, Bin Loafin, Bin Goofin, Bin Lunchin and Bin Drinkin have been taken into custody. Our agent advised us that they could find no one fitting the description of the sixth cell member, Bin Workin, at your office. Security is confident that anyone who looks like he's Bin Workin will be very easy to spot. You are obviously not a suspect at this time. |
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Thursday, 23 February 2006 |
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A lady called the police to report that her husband was missing. The police arrived and asked for a description of her husband. She told them that he was 6 foot 2 inches tall with blonde wavy hair and a smile that made everyone love him. The police proceeded to go next door to ask the neighbor if she had any information about the man. The lady next door, astonished at the description given to the police by her neighbor, told the police, "That's not true . He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, is bald and has a perpetual frown on his face." After the police left, the neighbor went to ask why the woman had given the police a false description of her husband. She replied, "Just because I reported him missing doesn't mean I want him back!" |
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Monday, 20 February 2006 |
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I was a new Army basic trainee at Fort McClellan, and one requirement was a demanding 12-mile march. We got started at 6 a.m. and were pumped up for the trek. An hour later, feeling the heavy load of our packs, we wondered if the end would ever come. "Men," our sergeant
yelled, "you're doing a fine job. We've already covered four miles!" Revitalized, we picked up the pace. "And," he continued, "we should reach the starting point any minute now." |
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